You can if you try

Sometimes my cats just amuse me. I left the box out for the little kittens to play in -- they love climbing into and under things, and I thought they'd enjoy this one. They did.But then Kwi took it over. Kwi loves boxes and sacks. I didn't think he could get into this one -- he's a big cat -- but not only did he get in, he also turned around in it, and batted the kittens away every time they tried for the opening, too.Silly cat.I looked at this picture and thought of it as a parable about doing things you don't think you can do... but my mood is more inclined to write about things you don't want to do.

I am a lousy housekeeper. So bad, that back when Russ had a good job we had someone come in every two weeks to clean. Heaven! Part of my battle with housework is plain old laziness, and another part is a back problem that makes some work -- like cleaning floors -- very painful. Anything that requires pressure or lifting something too heavy is a problem. I use that problem as an excuse rather than do a little at a time, and the work piles up.

So, I'm back to doing a little at a time. My method, which works as long as I stick with it, is to pick up something or clean up something in every room when I enter it. Little things here, little things there -- it gradually adds up, and then I'm left with cleaning the floors. I can do them a little at time, which is sometimes annoying because by the time I get a big part done, I have to start over -- but I get there eventually. (And yes, the back problem is a big reason why I work from home and don't have a regular job.)

I'll get everything cleaned up soon -- I just don't want to do it.

Life isn't filled with only what we want to do. There are parts of my working world that I love and others that drive me nuts. I enjoy DTF, but I hate reading the submissions. It has nothing to do with being good or bad material, and all with the act of sitting down, making notes as I read, and getting it done. I swear when we open back up for submissions I'm going to apply my 'pick something up' method to it and not let the material amass into huge piles again.

I love having Vision done, but it has been a problem. This one is mental. I know I owe money to people -- and with any luck everyone will be getting a check next week, since it looks like the state of Iowa paid us a huge amount of money for some work Russ did for them. Once I get everyone paid, I'll feel better about Vision again.

The one thing I do remind myself is that there are far worse things that I could be doing. I'm lucky. Despite going through some bad problems here while Russ tries to find a job, we're still holding on pretty well. Yeah, I'm out of blood pressure meds again and we're trying to figure out how to juggle the current small amount of money and keep utilities on... but we can see the top of the hill. Today three different companies called Russ for job interviews. He talked to the IRS, with whom we have been fighting for years, and they agree that they probably owe us a lot of back tax returns they've been holding. The state of Iowa says they cut the check -- is it actually in the mail? Who knows. It's already six weeks later than they first told us, so we're kind of waiting to see.

I have a possibility of doing cover art for another publisher. I'm working on my first piece and we'll see if she likes it. Do I need another job? No, not really. But it does pay, and that's important.

We've weathered this long, bad year with a lot of 'but I don't want to do it' problems that still got done. Sometimes you just have to be grateful for the work you can get, and both Russ and I have taken on freelance jobs we really didn't want at the time -- but we did them, did them well, and moved on.

And in the end, I am grateful for even the work that drives me nuts -- because I know I'm lucky. There are far worse jobs. I've done office work and factory work, and my favorite out-of-home job, running a bookstore for several years. None of it compares to the many facets of writing that I am involved in. Yeah, I would love to just write all the time instead of some of the other stuff -- but the other material has rewards as well. People like FM, Vision -- and one of the DTF books is up for an award. (Sara Reinke's Book of Days -- you can find it here: http://www.zettesworld.com/DT/bookofdays.htm)

So now I'm down to two practices which are helping me in life. One is my 'Writing Comes First' Campaign in the newest Vision (http://lazette.net/vision) and the other is the 'Pick Something Up' work in the house. The first keeps me happy and the second... Well, that keeps me happy, too.